The new Over-Achiever can balance everything: Nurture their spirit & be Successful at work and home!
Are you guilty of being an over-achiever? Do you need to learn to delegate or simply say ‘No’ sometimes because your hectic schedule and Santa-like list of commitments are starting to wear you down?
Over-achievers unite!! There is only twenty-four hours in a day, and yet you’re convinced you could talk Father Time into extending it a little so you could do more. Not always because you want to but because you feel you need to sometimes. Your list of commitments is getting so cluttered that not even Super Woman could complete them. You’re even losing the quality of work and relationships you know you’re capable of in exchange to do more.
Is it time to re-evaluate yet?
Did it ever cross your mind that you could improve the quality of your life by doing less?!
When you scatter your energy and focus, you lose substantial value because you are rushing through without concentrating strictly on the task at hand. This is not doing anyone any favours. Attention to details is important. It’s what makes the quality of a job well done. Yet it is almost impossible to maintain this quality with the details because of the simultaneous and expansive list of activities you have on the go.
An over-achiever typically reaches a point when it’s just not possible to add anything more; interest in any of their jobs begins to fade while their body simply drags sluggishly because of the neglect. The intention is almost always in everyone’s best interest but the outcome is not nearly as fruitful. You are exhausted.
Take a moment to look at ALL your commitments. Now imagine this list is your mother’s, your child’s or even your best friend’s. Would you consider it unrealistic if it were anyone else but yourself? If you are a typical over-achiever who has not learned to delegate or say ‘No’ yet, the answer no doubt, is a resounding YES.
Yes, the list of commitments is too long. It’s time to reduce your list and rejuvenate your spirit.
When you get to that point where you just couldn’t possibly say ‘yes’ to another committee, class, sporting event, tournament, bake sale, etc. then it’s time to learn to identify your priorities and embrace the beauty of delegation to reduce the strain on your tired soul. Eventually your body wants to drop everything and sleep for a month and most of us don’t have that kind of time. It’s best to spot the trend now before you dig too deep of a hole.
If pushed too far without nurturing yourself in the process, secretly you will resent the long list of extra-curricular activities you attend, supervise and act as a chauffeur, all for everyone else; even though you adore your children. That in itself will cause even more internal conflict that could send you into a guilt-ridden fog. It is paramount to take time for yourself and learn to say ‘No’.
The truth is we all need to stop and regenerate our spirit regularly in order to continue to give our time, concern and compassion to others. Do you want more quality in your work and relationships, instead of just a large quantity of activities that control your life?
You are not “doomed” to be a typical yes-only, frenzied and exhausted over-achiever all your life if you choose to make a conscious effort to show yourself the compassion you easily extend to everyone else.
You can be the focussed achiever who has balanced work, family, fun and self love.
Your ability to look at the big picture, prioritize, seek change and follow through will be vital, especially if you consider writing down your commitments and be realistic about what is essential.
After careful review of this list, identify your priorities and passions. Be careful not to fall back into the guilt-trap that ‘everyone needs you’ and ‘wouldn’t survive without your presence’ when doing this because you’ll end up with the same long list of commitments you started with and no further ahead than when you started.
Learn the art of delegation; say ‘No’ when you need to and start encouraging compromises by reducing the burden of your commitments and share responsibilities with others. For example: if there are numerous sporting events each week that you are consistently the chauffeur for, you could share the duty with other team members’ parents.
How would you like your children to see the world when they grow up? Like they are worthy of quiet time, self reflection and embracing their own passions while still providing love and support for others? Or, would you prefer that they wear themselves out as an expendable employee to a tyrant, inconsiderate employer, giving more than they should? Are your actions now congruent with the answer just given? They can be. It’s up to you.
When you do your best for Both you and your children (and family, etc) then you set a great example to those it matters most to. They are taught what you always wanted them to learn, through your actions, as you love and respect yourself. And in the process you can still volunteer your time and share your compassion with the world. Redefine what it is to be an over-achiever through love, respect and delegation (and maybe a solid ‘No’ once in awhile).
Success should not cost your spirit but rather feed your soul.
To the Top of The New Over-Achiever.